Lucky Charms. That ubiquitous box of marshmallow goodness that kids love and parents secretly want to eat themselves. A few years back they came up with a jingle, when jingles were still cool, that named out all the brightly colored marshmallow shapes within.
“Hearts, stars and horseshoes, clovers and blue moons, pots of gold and rainbows, and me red balloon!”
Maybe you didn’t remember the whole thing, but I did. I found a little nugget of God’s truth hiding behind the cute marketing campaign.
Searching for truths
Hearts- the heart is a symbol for love, of course and God is love. The heart is first because first and foremost God loves us and we must put Him first in our lives. The rest follows as it should when we do.
Stars- stars represent the goals and plans we have for our future. As the saying goes, shoot for the stars.
Horseshoes- remind us to focus on the goal, to score a ringer.
Clovers- to look for that which is hard to find. A four leaf clover is present in about a 1 in 10,000 ratio. Difficult to find, not impossible. If it were easy, it wouldn’t be worth it.
Blue moons- gratitude. Things may only happen once in a blue moon, so we must savor each and every moment and thank God for all the blessings in our lives
Pots of gold- abundance thinking rather than scarcity.
Rainbows- optimism. Seeing the sun after the storm.
Red balloon- rising above that which seeks to drag us down. Our world is full of things to keep us from joy, just watch the news!
Christina Loveless is a graduate of The Journey Training. Her insight of truths within simple things that are right in front of her are an amazing example of seeing more than is visible. In The Journey Training, trainees consistently become aware of truths that were once hidden – in the world, in their lives, and in others’ situations. Seeing things from difference perspectives is one of the many tools that you will take home from your Journey Training experience.
At the beginning of the year, someone asked me a question – a question that seemed unnatural to me. “What do you want?”
“What do I want?”
I was thrown off guard because I naturally think in terms of how I can make someone else’s life better, easier, or less worrisome. When the question was aimed at me, I didn’t know what to say. After much consideration I finally declared what I wanted, “No pain!” That seemed like an easy answer because I was in my fifth month dealing with shoulder pain. Major pain! I was four weeks out from a surgery that was more involved than first thought and the surgery came after an intense four months of physical therapy.
My answer was meant to appease the person asking it because it was obvious that I was in a lot of physical pain. Yet my answer avoided the real source of my pain – emotional pain. A betrayal that had caused me so much pain that I chose to go numb rather than to feel it. If I felt it I’d have to deal with it, and I didn’t want to deal with it because it was going to take work – a lot of work.
Finding your way requires direction
Life is a journey, and the first step in a journey is to know your destination. My destination was “No Pain,” which may be unrealistic for many reasons I won’t go into here. So I changed it to a journey of healing, with the final destination of health.
Once you know your destination you can begin on the path to it. When there is pain blocking your path, you tend not to head that way. This was the difficulty in my case. Pain was blocking my path, preventing me from arriving at my destination. But in order for me to be free from the pain, I needed to face the pain and deal with it.
Flats require attention
Facing and dealing with the pain in my journey was going to be like driving a hundred miles, getting a flat tire along the way, and continuing to drive on the flat trying to get there. It only causes more damage and could make the car inoperable.
If I pull over but don’t change the flat, I’ll remain stuck and never reach my destination. If I pull out all of the tools needed to change the flat, but if I don’t use the tools, I sit still on the side of the road, watching everyone else getting closer to their destinations.
Fix-a-flat and get moving!
Sometimes fixing a situation in your life requires an extra hand – someone to come alongside you who has the tools and ability to help you. That is what The Journey Training did for me. It connected me with people who have the tools I need, so as I am on my way, I can fix the “flats” along the way. It is an empowering, freeing and self-strengthening opportunity that I recommend for anyone to attend. If you’re too afraid to begin, or you’ve begun and have a flat, reach out the The Journey Training and get the tools you need to help you along your way today! Your destination awaits!
I’ve always wondered why rules are so hard to follow. Have you ever felt that way? It seems that when there is a rule, I gravitate to it. The rule is like the front porch light, and I’m the bug – frantically trying to break free but trapped by its gravity!
I was driving my daughter’s friend home when we came to a stop light. I glanced over and saw a really BIG sign. It said “NO TRESPASSING! VIOLATORS WILL BE PROSECUTED.” I said to her, “Look at that sign! That is the biggest no trespassing sign I have ever seen!” It was painted on two 4’x8’ plywood boards! She looked at me with her eyes wide open and said, “That makes me want to go in there!”
Why is this? Why are rules so hard to follow?
You become what you focus on
I once heard a story. There were two young boys who loved to visit their grandpa. He had a great big backyard with toy tractors and tools, and they were always excited to go to his house. When they arrived this day, they quickly asked, “Grandpa! Can we go play in your backyard?”
“Sure you can boys! But just don’t spit on my bushes!”
The two boys looked at each other in confusion, then shrugged and sped out the door. The grandpa walked over to the window and peeked through the blinds. The two boys walked down the steps and looked over at the bushes. They looked at each other, grinned, and before they ran to the tractors they spit on the bushes, which they would have never noticed had Grandpa not mentioned them.
You see, when we set rules to follow, we bring to the forefront of our thoughts and mind those things we shouldn’t do. In my own life, and in the lives of those whom I coach, I’ve found that the best way to break a rule is to make one. We all gravitate to what is forbidden. Adam and Eve did it in the Garden. God told them they could eat of any tree except the one. And we know the outcome of that story!
I had lunch with Jillian Michaels in Los Angeles and said to her, “Jillian, I can’t shake it! The more I think to stay away from certain foods, the more I seem to want them!” She said to me, “Danny, I have one all-natural, Newman’s Own dark chocolate peanut butter cup every single day of my life. Why? Because if I deprive myself of it I will only want it more – then I eat 2 or 3 or even 4! Don’t deprive yourself of the things you love – just work them into your plan and stick to the plan!” I’ll tell you, I’m not the thinnest guy on the block right now, but I’m not 300, 400, or even 500 pounds anymore either. And it has to do with that plan Jillian was talking about.
Set standards, and make them a part of your plan
If we tend to become what we focus on, why would we want to focus on what not to do? Let’s focus on the plan – let’s focus on what we need to do! Let’s set some standards.
Let’s look at the definitions of standard: “A level of quality or attainment. An idea used to measure the norm (normal) in comparative evaluations. Accepted as normal or average.”
When we set standards, we raise the bar, creating a target to shoot for. When we set rules, we create governing boundaries for ourselves, or curbs, to stay within. Rules limit our performance instead of creating a higher standard to attain. And in my experiences, when I’m shooting for something, I am much more motivated to achieve it.
Know the standards, find the target
When I was at The Biggest Loser ranch, we learned which foods to eat. We learned to add water to our diet and to increase our steps every day. We also created a standard of workout that expanded our lives. One of the running jokes about being a Biggest Loser Alumni is that once you’ve been a contestant, walking distance means a completely different thing. I used to think walking distance was 600 feet, but now it means 5 miles!
Sure, we knew to stay away from certain foods, but more than that we knew the foods to gravitate to; and when we eat the right food and drink plenty of water, the wrong foods don’t even come into the picture. You see what I mean? Sure, we avoided having certain foods within our grasp; we just left them off the grocery list.
Standards work in all areas of life
Standards work in your office or family, with your team, or in any area of life! I once heard Mike Krzyzewski, the Duke University head coach and coach of several U.S. Olympic basketball teams explain something. How can you coach The Dream Team and have several huge egos such as Michael Jordon, Scotty Pippen, Karl Malone, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird, Patrick Ewing, and Charles Barkley, and have them work together as a team? How do you tell them to be on time or adhere to a curfew? These are the greatest names in basketball! Well, Coach Mike explained that at the first meeting, instead of laying out rules to the team, HE asked them what standards should be created for the team. They went around one by one and shouted them out: “Be on time!” “Get your sleep!” and on and on…until they set the standards for their team themselves. Because they had ownership in the standards, they adhered to them. Coach Krzyzewski said that if he’d set rules for them, they would have gone out of their way to break them and prove who was in charge.
This can work in your own life, too. In your family, let your kids take part in setting the family standards. In your office or business, let your employees or team take part. Their ownership of the standards will give them a voice, and in turn motivation to adhere to them without so many rules. And in your own life, don’t deprive yourself of all enjoyable things, but set standards that include some of those things, and more importantly the things that will get you where you want to go. You might just find that the rules will fade into the background and not become the focus when you are busy shooting for your standards, and in turn shooting for the stars!
I can be extremely self-conscious about my abilities from time to time. I am considered “the crazy guy,” the out of the box thinker. I travel all over the country speaking about crazy ideas and ventures. I even mentor others on building their own road to success. You might picture me as this courageous guy with nerves of steel, right? Wrong! I still get nervous before speaking engagements, but I do them. I recently wrote another book but what will others think of my writing?
Fear
There are stories going off in my head right now. They are very real….to me.
- I wrote this book to brag about my knowledge
- I am working to promote me, not my book.
- Who am I to be giving “tips” to others?
The list goes on and on, and I know that I am not the only one that lives with doubts like this every day!!
Courage
What am I going to do with these criticisms swirling in my head?
- Are these thoughts really true about me?
- Do I believe these things about myself?
- Regardless of what other people think, is what I am doing supporting my purpose and mission?
Once you have worked through those questions you will know better how to work through criticisms that you are dealing with.
Are any of these criticisms true about myself? Courage is not the absence of fear, it is having the fear and pushing through it. I choose to focus on my mission and push ahead.
I wrote this book to pass on that knowledge. I have been honored to co-author the book with a talented friend of mine. Bryan Smith and I are very proud of this book. Breaking Conformity is our first professional book about business. This book will help new and seasoned professionals. I have acquired so much knowledge and have learned valuable lessons from those before me, including brilliant individuals who have mentored me. It is important to share information and pass on that great knowledge to others.
Breaking Conformity will help new emerging leaders as well as veteran ones to look at business myths that plague us. It will give the rest of the story, which will help in overcoming any hurdle quickly, making the length of time to success even quicker.
As this book prepares to launch I am filled with anxiety, nervousness and fear but also pride and excitement to share this with others. I am pushing through the fear and choosing courage. How will you push through the fear today, this week, this month? Choose courage!
*Breaking Conformity is available on Amazon.com on October 19th 2015. Help us to help others by purchasing our book. Help us become #1 best sellers on Amazon!
I am where I am meant to be, when I am meant to be there.
How often do we miss purpose in the moment? How often do we look toward the future and miss what is happening now? Whether it is a chance to be kind to someone, a chance to isolate yourself and reflect, or maybe a chance to meet the love of your life? So often we forget to open our eyes and see what God is showing us in the moment. Maybe because we are constantly looking back – hurting and wishing it could change – or perhaps too much toward the future, planning what we wish would happen.
Maybe it’s time to stop looking at your past; it’s behind you for a reason. And to stop looking to your future for a moment, because your whole life can change in an instant. If you’re always looking at the last or next moment, you’re missing the moment right there in front of you.
Trust the Process
Trust the process of the moment you are in, and know that God is working in your current moment to impact your future. Sometimes we try and plan way too much; and sometimes the lesson we need to learn is being given to us in the moment of life circumstances you are currently going through.
I am currently performing at Disney World, which honestly isn’t my dream job. I’m only here till January and it is a fun job, but not the biggest career option I’ve made. I personally had a very challenging year and I felt like I was supposed to take this job for a reason, even though it was not in my “plan” at all.
Often, there are great moments where I get to do some cool things, and I’ve had some fun times. I thought I would come down here, save some money, have some fun, and just enjoy myself. Although that is happening, I feel like God is working in my life a lot more through this experience than I had ever expected.
In the last couple months I’ve prayed for humility – the power to let go of the things and people I cannot control – and for opportunities to give love to others.
Although there are some days I get to dress up like a prince and be the center of attention – which I always enjoy – I had to be trained and work in what we call “Fur”, where you are anonymously playing a character that is fully covered. I felt worthless doing this, not to mention HOT! During these shifts, I felt like I wasn’t fully using my talents. I was annoyed and grumpy every time! And then one day I was “friends with Goofy” and a woman came up to me. She hugged me and started crying – a woman in her late 40’s – because of me playing a costumed Dog! She said “you have gotten me through so much, and I’ve waited my entire life to meet you!”
Talk about a perspective shift! Since that day, I’ve had more and more experiences like this, and it’s almost always happened while I was “in fur” and not too happy about it. I began to realize that the experience is God giving me an opportunity to be humble and to serve others without them knowing who I am. God doesn’t always give you exactly what you pray for; he gives you an opportunity to make a choice and do what it is you are praying for. He is handing me opportunities to be humble.
It’s not about me
Being in the entertainment industry it’s easy to become self-absorbed while also being self-critical. It’s easy to begin seeing people as products, business and fans instead of human beings. Something I really learned from going through The Journey Training was how to see value in myself and in others. Every person has a story, and I’m learning that here at Disney World even more. No matter if I’m dancing in a parade, playing a hero, or simply in fur, I get the opportunity to practice humility. And even though they don’t know it’s me, I’m making someone’s day by serving them. Serving…such an important lesson to learn.
Before I came to Florida I had a very challenging couple weeks, full of disappointment, frustration, and fear – and definitely some regret. I struggle a lot with trusting God to take care of situations. I take on the responsibility to fix others’ lives. The reality is, you can only do so much. Many things came to a head just a few weeks before leaving home, and the fear that came over me was that I wouldn’t be able to take care of it all and see the outcome.
While being away at Disney world, I have been challenged to give space to people who are not adding to my life, and to face situations that I cannot control. And if I were home, I probably wouldn’t have let go. God planned it – with me by being here!
Lately while being on my own, I’ve been able to meet some of the most amazing “Make a Wish” kids from all over the world, seeing so many come together for a mutual love of magic and happiness. There is one thing that everyone in the world can relate to; that is being hugged, being loved, and someone taking the time to say “you are worth it.”
I’ve also learned balance and am able to love people from a distance and in different ways. I can set boundaries while still seeing everyone as equally imperfect and beautiful creatures of God.
The plan is the plan, even if it’s not mine!
This plan may not be my plan, and I’m not be getting everything I wanted, but living with humility and realizing that God has a purpose in every moment is something I will take from here and live with forever. Through this experience, I have become closer to God than ever before, and in turn, closer to the destiny He has for me.
So in your life, trust the moment. Look around you and realize that there is beauty and opportunity in this moment – right now; there is more to the greater plan than what we can see or comprehend, so dare to let go a little! Trust this moment, and know you are where you are meant to be where you are right now.
Duncan was a trainee in The Journey Training, Class 13. The insight he has received from the training has helped him see value in things he was unaware of before, allowing him to trust the process and find the value where he is right now. Each month, so many are able to find treasure in what they considered trash, allowing them to take their past and make a purpose out of it for the present and the future. If you are ready to begin your Journey, why not sign up for the next Threshold class and embark on the adventure of your life?
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