Getting from one point to another usually isn’t that hard. We usually make it hard. Most of the time it doesn’t look the same for everyone, with steps that can be very different. We are all at different places in our lives, and throwing a personal development training into our budget of finances and time can create a little chaos…if we allow it to. How are you getting from Point A to Point B?
When we have something that isn’t planned suddenly appear, our first reaction can be, “I can’t do it.” Why do we think that? I say it is the easy way to think; it’s our comfort zone – all warm and fuzzy – and we like it there. After all, the easiest way to deal with a problem is to forget about the problem, right?
If we look at it from an abundance mindset, or one of growth, we can begin to see it differently. If you went through Threshold, you can clearly see the impact the training has had on your life. And unlike other trainings, you’ll remember this one for years to come. You may ask, “How can we have our cake and eat it too?” Well, all of these are examples from true stories of people from The Journey Training and how they went from A to B. Use this as a guide – a template – to start the juices flowing for figuring out how to make this happen for you.
Have you ever had a situation where you were doing all the work while someone else was just sitting off to the side, not doing their fair share making you frustrated? I have. It is in our nature as humans to want to help others. At the same time, we don’t want to be taken advantage of. I know for me, when someone is in need of finances, and they are willing to make an effort to do something, I will jump in and want to help them. On the flip side, if they are not willing to make an effort, I can lose the desire to help. Here are some ideas that we’ve seen from people who got off their ask and made some efforts, and it served them well.
- It snowed, and we walked the neighborhood asking if we could shovel their walk, for a donation so we could go to The Journey.
- When it snowed, I used my suburban to pull people out of ditches, and they gave me money toward The Journey Training.
- I posted on social media that I would be willing to babysit for anyone if they wanted to go on a date.
- I offered to clean houses to make some money to go toward my next Journey class, and I achieved my goal! AND was able to do a little after that helped me supplement my income.
- I sewed a quilt, and auctioned it off to TJT alumni.
- I did a bike marathon, and set it up as a fundraiser, and I asked people to sponsor me per mile I rode the bike.
- Went to Sam’s Club and bought some beef jerky and candy bars, then I sold it at work as a fundraiser to come back to The Journey.
- We gave plasma. It gave us time together, and gave us some extra cash to make this happen. (I just got a message from someone that you can earn up to $400 your first month giving plasma by doing it 2x per week)
- I Gave Blood.
- I offered to mow anyone’s grass to make money to go to Crossroads, and I did it!
- Once we had 2 girls in one class that were massage therapists. They had a dinner and everyone came over. They gave 30 min massages to everyone for donations.
- I offered to do miscellaneous stuff, so I hung helped hang Christmas lights.
- Sign up with Uber and become a Taxi in your spare time.
- I had a fundraiser dinner, where I cooked all the food, and people from the alumni group paid to come have dinner.
- People have sold Chick-fil-A calendars as a fundraiser. (This is an option from Aug-Dec only)
- Selling miscellaneous things on EBay, Craigslist, or even to a Pawn Shop – DISCLOSURE: we are not telling you to go sell all your stuff to go thru TJT! We are encouraging you to think differently, with an open mind, on ways to raise funds if you need them.
- Trainees have organized Garage Sales to raise money to go, or to help those in their class go.
Or perhaps you could make the difference by cutting back. (Oh my goodness, he said it.) We want what we want when we want it, right? Well sometimes hitting our goals makes things look a little different. Saying NO to something, even just for a little while, can be a healthy practice and a way to raise needed funds to get back to Crossroads. No does not have to mean no forever. Ask yourself, “Could I be spending money foolishly? Can I cut back on anything? Decrease my spending?” Here are some examples of cutting back:
- “I would get Starbucks or a Chick-fil-A tea every day on my way to work. By cutting this out for a time, it saved me $60 per month that I could put towards my training.
- “I called my cable provider. I asked them how I could lower my cost, and that if I didn’t, I’d have to stop using them altogether. Guess what? THEY CUT MY COST $19 A MONTH!”
- “We cut back on our eating out, and with just 3 extra meals at home we saved $40 per month!”
Every one of us has Talents and Gifts that God intends us to use. What are yours? Is there anything you can offer to people to raise funds.
- People have made T-Shirts with Journey things on it for their class and other alumni to buy.
- People have made wall hanging art – one said “Life is better on the Boat!” – and sold it to alumni
- People have made stained glass items and sold them to people.
- People have sold custom-made cookies for events.
- People have prepared pans of Lasagna for alumni to buy so they’d have a pre-made dinner for their family.
- Someone created Hair Bows and sold them to people.
- Someone created custom coasters for people using pictures for fundraising.
- Someone did a phot shoot for funds for their next training.
When we are making efforts to hit our goals, others can be encouraged by this. They may even want to jump in to help! Unfortunately, there are those who don’t make the effort and end up not reaching their goals – which is going victim to their circumstances. Look at all these ideas. Maybe it’s time to set your pride aside, and think about what you can do to invest in yourself!
And if you’ve already finished your trainings, there is a Class 3 called LAUNCH that is about to begin, so maybe you need to save up for that! And maybe you’d save someone’s life by doing these things again and sponsoring someone you love to fill your seat in The Journey Training.
I went to a get-together last night that made me start thinking. The question was asked, “What is worship to you?” As I sat and listened to the different responses, one part of everyone’s answer that was in common: a connection with God.
Many were there, and while we all had that common thread we all also had our own personal experiences and ways that we worship. I was so inspired by many that I almost felt my answer was inadequate. Instead of beating myself up I asked myself, “What can I do to make it more meaningful and to build my relationship with Christ to be even stronger?” That’s how I went to bed.
https://youtu.be/2l6SNMUxB8c
Ask
When I woke up the next morning for the strangest reason I was thinking about funny tech-support stories.
So, I got up and Googled it. I remembered the stories where they asked the customer, “Do you have the power on?” And when the power doesn’t come on the all-important question becomes, “Is it plugged in?” I started putting my questions to myself the night before into these tech-support scenarios. Is the power on? Better yet, am I plugged in?
Let me see; I do my daily devotions, although I allow life to get in my way more than I should. What about my prayer life? How often do I actually talk to God? I do, but not as often as I should. I usually pray after I read my daily devotional – for a good day, to keep my family safe, for new and present clients, for friends and other requests. I pray with my kids each night before bed & sometimes before we eat. When I see a prayer request on FB, I always say a little prayer right then because if I don’t I’ll probably forget. And, as most people, I pray when life gets tough. I guess in my own trouble-shooting, I guess my power is on.
But am I really plugged in? It doesn’t matter how many times you push the power button if it isn’t even plugged in. It’s more than going through the motions of going to church, daily devotions, and saying routine prayers. If I’m really plugged in I have a constant connection with God. I know He’s always there for me, but how often do I break that connection? A common occurrence for many. I often think, “I can do it myself” or “I’m too embarrassed or ashamed” (as if He doesn’t already know). Or “It’s too small to ask God for help” or even “this doesn’t really matter.”
Get out of your own way
I watched a comedian, who referred to a tech call where eventually the customer was asked if there was a child that lived in the house. There happened to be a 9 year old girl, and within a few minutes the problem was solved. The problem that the adult mind couldn’t get it done. Hmmmm, a child. In Matthew 19:14, Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these.” Then it hit me. I need to come to Jesus as a child. I may have the power on by going to church, performing praise and worship, or participating in drama ministry – all of which are very important, but if I’m not plugged in and have that connection with Jesus, my relationship with Him doesn’t grow.
How am I approaching these things? Sometimes I wonder if Jesus possibly has a double meaning. Of course He is welcoming children, but maybe He was also telling us to come to Him like a child. We are like children – little two year olds that are full of independence and insist on trying it themselves – until we reach for our parents.
Remember the embarrassing secret story your parents actually already knew, and they hugged you to help you feel better. And remember that balloon you took to daddy to fix after it had popped? Dad just smiles because it’s such a precious little question, and then he gets you another balloon. Then he beams as you run off telling everyone how your daddy can fix anything! Just like our parents, God steps back and allows us to try to do it on our own. Then He welcomes us with open arms when we finally give it to Him. He embraces us in those embarrassing moments and lets us rest in the peace of knowing He is a forgiving God, full of grace for His children. In His arms there is no need to be ashamed. And, He smiles at us when we come to Him with our own “broken balloons.” Nothing is too small to take to Him. And how He must feel when we share with others that He can fix anything – even though it might not be how we envisioned He’d fix it.
Know His heart – and connect
Our relationship with Him isn’t meant to be complicated. It is as simple as a Daddy/child relationship. I see through my trouble shooting that the key to moving into a deeper relationship with Christ is to first make sure I’m plugged in and the power is on. Then I must go to my Heavenly Father as a little child to their daddy. I must stop breaking our connection. I must remember that I don’t have to do any of it by myself – I can rest peacefully in His arms no matter how embarrassed or ashamed I am, knowing He will forgive me and that He loves me. And that nothing is too small – or too big – for God to take care of.
The next time find yourself doubting, in fear, or in pain, first you should try some simple tech-support questions. I think you’ll find that He has every answer you need.
The difference between good and bad are morals.
The difference between light and darkness are lumens.
The difference between black and white is reflection.
The difference between care and abuse is nurturing.
The difference between certainty and confusion is knowledge.
The difference between love and hate is acceptance.
The difference between the truth and a lie is honesty.
The difference between trust and doubt is a choice.
The difference between commitment and rejection is honor.
The difference between helping and hurting is contribution.
The difference between love and hate is compassion.
The difference between beauty and ugliness is perspective.
The difference between a promise and a breach is commitment.
The difference between being happy and being right is pride.
The difference between thriving and want is abundance.
The difference between courage and fear is boldness.
The difference between power and victim mentality is responsibility.
The difference between giving and taking is contribution.
The difference between success and failure is focus.
The difference between reality and acting is authenticity.
The difference between forgiveness and unforgiveness is grace.
Very little separates one thing from another, but the difference between all of them are you and me.
I don’t think there is a more polarizing vegetable. At the mention of them the reactions are generally one of “Yuck!” Some people say just the name leaves a bad taste in their mouth. I, however, am one of the ones in the other camp; I happen to love them.
I didn’t grow up eating Brussel sprouts; in fact, I didn’t even try them until I was in my twenties. I think that made the difference. Those who were forced to eat them before their palate was ready have rejected those poor little miniature cabbages for all eternity.
How often do we do the same thing with certain habits?
Experience changes things
Say you tried dieting before you were fully ready to commit. You wouldn’t have much success, right? Perhaps you thought to yourself, “I hate dieting! This isn’t for me,” and you just gave up and never tried to diet again because of that early failure.
Allow your palate to mature and give it a second (or third or fourth…) try. As we grow and change throughout our lives, we are more able to see connections that we couldn’t before. Our experiences in different parts of life are able to shape our thoughts and decisions in the rest of our life.
Take money for example. As an impulsive young woman, I had to have a tight grip on my finances. I had to know exactly what my bank balance was and what my upcoming bills were before I would allow myself to go to the mall.
I thought constantly about how much was ok to spend and where the line in the sand would be on my spending limit, whether it was for a new clothes or groceries. I couldn’t simply enjoy going out with friends, I obsessed over what I would allow myself to spend on dinner. I stopped eating out altogether at one point, choosing to eat at home and meet up with everyone else later. All of that worrying was what I thought budgeting was.
I told myself that worrying was the only way of being smart with money. In effect, I let my money control me. I hated it! When my husband and I first got engaged, I happily gave him pretty much total control of the money and budgeting. I gave away my power with it and for years, I would avoid any conversation that was centered around money.
Fear breeds avoidance
Being afraid of money isn’t healthy. I just wasn’t mature enough to learn how to budget properly and find a way that made me comfortable. This is still something that I struggle with, due to some deeper issues, but I’m slowly (very slowly!) finding ways to make my budget work for me and not the other way around.
Face your brussel sprouts!
Maybe you have been avoiding brussel sprouts for too long. Try them in a different way. Try them roasted instead of boiled. Or sautéed up with bacon and cranberries. Instead of counting calories and being afraid of food, find a different diet that works with how you are NOW. Instead of being afraid of money, find a budget plan that works with your lifestyle (and personality). Instead of forcing yourself to date the way everyone else does, find something that works for you.
So the next time you hear your friends talk about Brussel sprouts, don’t just shudder and say “Yuck!” Think about how you can see them in a different light.
Christina is a graduate of The Journey Training. The Journey Training is an experiential training that can help you see different perspectives, conquer your fears, and find different directions to success. Perhaps you’ve been struggling with something even though the answer has been right there in front of you. Maybe you just need to pause, take a breath, and step sideways so as to see things from a different perspective. The Journey Training can help you do that! Sign up for the next Threshold class today!
When I was writing my book Lose Your Quit in 2011, I noticed something: that every experience I had on The Biggest Loser built on an experience before to create something completely different. I also noticed that these experiences were similar to experiences I had previously in my life. This time they were magnified by television and also, I believe I was better equipped to deal with them – maybe because I had visited them before.
Life is Fractal
Fractal Geometry is an amazing thing. When I first heard of it, I didn’t quite know what it was. Simply, it is a recurring pattern found in mathematics that is also found in nature. Wikipedia puts it like this: “A fractal is a natural phenomenon or a mathematical set that exhibits a repeating pattern that displays at every scale. It is also known as expanding symmetry or evolving symmetry. If the replication is exactly the same at every scale, it is called a self-similar pattern.”
I believe that life is built on fractal and self-similar patterns. I’ve heard that “history repeats itself,” which I believe is not only a natural thing, but it is a God created thing. First, let me explain Fractal Geometry in nature. If you look at a tree, there is a correlation between the distances between the branches on the trunk, and the twigs on the branches. That same mathematical pattern is reproduced in the veins on the leaves. It is also seen in everything from snowflakes, pine cones, and even in the meanders of a river. I believe it I also found in our lives.
I relate these situations in my life. The first home I can remember was a house in Del City, Oklahoma. I was four years old when we lived there. I shared a room with my two sisters, and my grandma lived with us. That house was HUGE! When I got married, I bought the house for Darci and I to live in. Let me tell you – that house is SMALL! 700 square feet to be exact! Two bedrooms, a living room, 1 bathroom and a small kitchen. It had no laundry room and a detached garage. Why did it seem so big as a kid, and so small as an adult?
Experience Shrinks Things (or does it?)
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” I want to poke whoever wrote that in the eye! When we were kids, a simple, “What’s wrong with you?” can cut to the core. Maybe you thought, “there must be something wrong with me if they’re asking” or “there’s all kinds of things wrong with me.” When someone says that now, it has less impact on me, or at least I’d like to think it does.
In life, we experience similar pain at different points of my life. When we were asked what was wrong with us as a child, that can be repeated with “why did you do that?” or “that’s not what I would have done.” We even begin to ask ourselves that question: What is wrong with me?
When someone hurt me as a child, it made me feel a certain way. Since then, I have experienced other hurts that produced a similar feeling, and my actions and thoughts go back to that point when I was a child – along with the feelings. It makes me subconsciously relive that old hurt, and in turn I feel I am no further down the road in my life. In fact, I am much further along, and that self-similar pattern creates an opportunity for me. I can revert back to that child and react in a childish way, or I can use my experiences and deal with the situation in a different, healthier way – like I did on The Biggest Loser.
Respond, don’t React
When I was on the Black Team on the show, I found myself alone. My team had an alliance, and I wasn’t a part of that. To make a long story short, my team threw a weigh-in with the goal of self-preservation, and when they lost they planned to vote me home. And to top things off, Jillian Michaels – my coach – knew about this and coached them through it! I felt betrayed, and it took me back to the child that felt like I didn’t matter when all everyone talked about was his older sisters and how great they were. Every year, the teacher usually said, “You’ve got quite a name to live up to!” And guess what – I spent my entire life trying to live up to expectations that I had put on myself – that I could never achieve no matter what I would accomplish.
Each time I “revisit” an event that takes me back, I tend to react just like that child. I throw a temper tantrum, cry, feel hopeless, and if it makes me angry, I rage! I feel that these recurring events in our life – that are fractal in nature – are opportunities. They are opportunities for us to choose a different, more productive path for ourselves than we did in the past.
When I was betrayed on The Biggest Loser, I raged at first. Then I collected myself and remembered what my rage brought me in my past. I went back to when those events seemed much larger in my life. I wanted a different outcome this time! So I weighed my opportunities. I could punch Jillian out, or perhaps my teammates. OUTCOME: Jail. I could quit the show and give up. OUTCOME: Opportunity Loss.
I chose different. If I was the Biggest Loser of the week (lost the most percentage of weight), I was immune and they couldn’t vote me off. I chose to respond rather than react by kicking it into high gear and lapping everyone! OUTCOME: Record Holder for 7-weeks in a row double digit weight loss, and the Biggest Loser ever among the men of the show, and let’s not forget $250,000 and the title of The Biggest Loser! I’LL TAKE IT!
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