It was 5 days before Christmas. I decided to brave TJ Maxx HomeGoods for the last of my shopping. Two hours later, I’m in the rather long checkout line. Ten registers, one queue line, an aisle of impulse buys behind that, and the line was beginning to pour over into another new line. A few spots behind me, there was a man holding a rather large box. The ladies directly behind me offered to get him a buggy. What’s a buggy you ask? It’s that thing you push that many people call a cart. The man declined the buggy and continued to wait and hold his box. A few minutes later I looked back and he was gone. I don’t know his story or why he left, but I know that before I went through The Journey Training, I also often held onto too much stuff when I should’ve gotten a buggy.
I’ve always had a hard time accepting help. Just because I had a prenatal stroke which weakened my left side and also made me legally blind, I didn’t want to be perceived as weak. I was bullied enough as a child that I told myself stories that everyone thought I was weak. In my mind, I should carry the same bulky and heavy boxes anyone else does and be trusted with the same amount of fragile material…despite all of my falls. I had to accept that other people have to drive me, but I’m perfectly capable of carrying a week’s worth of groceries in and out of the car by myself.
When I attended my first Journey Training class, I began to see areas of my life that were weighing me down. The Threshold weekend showed me how much I needed to put in a buggy. The next weekend, Crossroads, helped me grab a buggy and actually use it. I felt lighter than ever before! The third class, Launch, showed me how important the buggy is to fulfilling my life’s purpose.
If you’re weighed down, maybe The Journey Training is your buggy! The next class is just around the corner! Grab a buggy and lighten your load!
“My yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:30
My dad always told me, “Never buy a brand new car! As soon as you drive it off the lot, it’s worth thousands less than when you signed the papers!” I always wondered why that was true, but it is. Just try it! Buy a $20,000 car and drive it home. Then put it up for sale. It might only have 10 miles on the odometer, but you won’t get anyone to buy it for what you paid.
The value of a dollar is exactly that: a dollar! Then why does a car depreciate? One reason is because it becomes “used.” A car usually lasts a certain number of miles, and the longer it is driven, generally the less it is worth. My old truck, which my daughter’s friends call “The Hobo Truck”, has well over 220,000 miles on it, rust on the sides and scratches all over it! I even wrecked that old GMC, and my friend fixed it with a Chevy front end! It’s such a rag-tag truck, but I love it. It has taken me to all kinds of places; to see my kids perform, to my job, to the tryout of The Biggest Loser, and to so many great places creating so many great memories – but I doubt anyone else would find the kind of value in it that I do. To them, it’s just a junky old truck.
What about you? What are you worth?
So often we have let others determine our value by their thoughts and actions. When we were young, the opinion of others meant little to us. When we began to learn to walk, we fell down again and again – and people laughed! But we didn’t care. We got up and tried again and we eventually succeeded, but not before a thousand laughs and chuckles. Yet we didn’t let it bother us one bit.
Somewhere along the way, we began to care about what others think about us – perhaps just a little too much. The “you’ll never amount to anything” that a teacher said, or the “You’re ugly” or “You’re stupid” that a person said when we were young became so imprinted on our hearts that it caused us to depreciate in value. When we failed at something in front of others and were laughed at, we felt like a failure instead of an explorer that simply hit a bump in the road. And when we were picked on or hurt and abused by someone, it caused us to question our value and worth. Well, I am going to tell you something: You are worth the same, if not more, than the day you were born.
Remember that dollar? No matter how old it becomes or how many hands it passes through to become used and abused, torn, tattered and neglected – it’s still worth a dollar. Yet I see so many people who think they’re worth so little – just because they’ve been used, abused, torn, tattered and neglected. They feel small. They think, “Who am I to think I can do that?” or maybe “Who would want me as a friend?” I see it every day, and it breaks my heart. I still feel depreciated at times. Why will we will hold a dollar in our hand and no matter what, we know is worth the same as any other dollar! In fact, the older it gets, it can actually appreciate! An old dollar bill can be worth thousands of times its original value! Then I ask: why can’t you?
No matter what they say, you are beautiful. No matter what they think, you are awesome. No matter how they treat you, you are worthy. Still don’t believe me? Then do me a favor: take out a dollar bill, crumple it up, throw it down, stomp on it, and cover it with dirt. Then pick it up, shake it off and take it to the store and ask for change. I’ll bet you they give you a dollar’s worth!
Graduates of The Journey Training consistently say they feel more valuable in most areas of their lives after completing our courses. Do you want to get back the explorer in you that’s not afraid to try again – no matter what they say? Sign up for the next Journey Threshold class and see where it leads you. It led me to become the Biggest Loser in the history of the show!
Everyone of us has tapes. OK, OK maybe you’re too young to know what a “tape” is. Call them tapes, CDs, records, mp3s — whatever works for you. What I am referring to is something that plays in your head. See, everyone has stories we tell ourselves about ourselves. The problem with this is that we actually listen to the stories. We actually believe them.
My friend Mike told a story about this at The Journey Training once. It went something like this…
“Let’s say we put 110 guys in a room. 99 of them are amazing people and one of them was a scumbag. Who would you walk out with?”
Sadly, every one of you likely had a person come to your mind when picturing the scumbag. And many of you ladies unfortunately see yourself walking out with him. Why is that?
At The Journey Training we have had hundreds of people come through, hear this illustration, and almost all of them can tell you why so many see themselves walking out with the jerk. It’s not because of what people around them say. It’s because of the “self-talk” they say to themselves. It’s the tape they play and listen to in their heads about themselves.
When we see people in movies standing in front of a mirror saying things like, “I’m beautiful!” and “I am worth a million bucks!”, we often laugh. But practices like that are actually healthy things to do. Check out what this article from WikiHow says about building self-worth:
“Healthy self love is about being your own best friend. Self love is expressed not through preening oneself all day and constantly announcing how great you are (those are signs of intense insecurity); rather, self love is about treating yourself with the same care, tolerance, generosity, and compassion as you would treat a special friend. Treat yourself with care, compassion, and respect. Avoid overlaying how you think other people see you; how does it help you to capitulate to their idea of you?”
See? There IS some validity to psyching yourself up and going out to find that person that you used to think was out of your league. Remember: They may feel exactly the same way and think they don’t deserve YOU!
In The Journey Training, one thing we encourage people to look at is their own value. How many of us have have been told that we are worthless? How often have people made fun of us, called us names, laughed at our mistakes, or ridiculed decisions we’ve made?
Too often we take these things in and use them to assess our self-worth.
I saw a great illustration of this once. A speaker took an old, used $50 bill and asked, “Who wants this $50?” Everyone in the room raised their hand. Then he proceeded to crumple it up, throw it around, stomp on it, and curse at it. When we was done, the bill was wrinkled, crumpled, partially torn in the middle, and missing a corner. There was even a brown stain on it that probably came from whatever was on the bottom of his shoe.
To the quiet room he asked again, “Who wants this?”
Every person in the room still said “Yes!” Why? Because no matter what it had gone through, it didn’t lose it’s value.
No matter where you’ve been or what you’ve been through, you have the ability to love. You have the ability to inspire, to help, to give, to encourage. You have incredible value. You just have to make the choice to believe it and to act on that belief.
If you need help seeing this truth, check out our website at www.thejourneytraining.com.