The other day I was at the soccer field waiting for my daughter’s game to begin. The teams were still warming up, so I decided to sit in my car for a few minutes to eat my lunch out of the sun. While I ate, I saw another team of 5 year old girls practicing on another field. It was really funny to watch. Wherever the ball went, every player on the field chased it back and forth like an entire school of fish following some bait.
Then I saw something amazing. One of the girls ran to kick the ball, but she missed it completely and fell on her knees. She sat their stunned for a moment and then began to cry. One of the girls from the other team that was nearby stopped to help her up and gave her a hug. Then another girl from the other team did the same thing. It was absolutely adorable. Without realizing it, these girls understood the importance of “sharing the win.”
This little drama made me think about the “games” we play in life. How often do we win, dominating the opposition, and then just walk away, never thinking of the other team. These little girls understood something we seem to have forgotten…
One of the organizations I invest time in is called Thrive15.com. I did an interview for them where I talked about the law of reciprocity. When I pour myself into other people’s lives, they do the same for me when I need it. I have found that creating win-win situations for people almost always circles back around to me at some point and they end up creating the same for me later.
I started thinking about how often we play a game in life where it could be a win win scenario, but we just “win” and then walk away with only the victory on our mind. Is it possible that there is even a bigger “win” to be had that would make a more lasting impact if we would learn the power of “sharing the win?”
I believe so.
I believe that enlarging our vision to include others can greatly increase what we accomplish each day. What if we decided ahead of time that sharing the win would be our goal whenever possible? The difference it makes not only in the situation, but also in other people can change far more in the world than if we chose to focus solely on ourselves.
I don’t think that everyone deserves a trophy for everything. That’s not always productive. However, is there a time during your day that you AND someone else can BOTH win? With a little effort and attention, I bet you can make it happen.
What can you do today that will help someone else experience a win? I challenge you to start “sharing the win!”
Do you find it hard to trust people? Or maybe you even find it hard to trust yourself. Trust comes with practice – and it is a choice. Many people I’ve asked have told me, “I don’t trust someone unless I know them. It must be earned.” Is that the truth?
We trust every day of our lives. We trust people we don’t even know to stay on the opposite side of that double-yellow line separating traffic. We trust the food handlers in a restaurant when we order a meal. We trust a chair when we sit in it. And we trust a pilot to fly us in an airplane.
The following is a definition of trust from dictionary.com:
TRUST | confident expectation of something; hope.
Let’s explore this further.
A benefit of trust is relationship.
Without it, we miss out on one of the most fruitful things in life – relationships. Friendship, dating, marriage, and family all begin with trust. And if you choose not to trust someone, you can never experience the pleasure of these relationships to a deeper extent.
Another benefit of trust is freedom.
Do you try to do everything yourself? You may be missing out on opportunities by spending all of your time doing what you could trust others to do for you. Hey – this is biblical! In Exodus 18:13-27, Moses was trying to hear all of the disputes of the people himself. His father-in-law told him, “This is not good! You’re going to wear yourself out, and the people, too. This job is too heavy a burden for you to handle by yourself.” He told Moses to find elders who he could trust to settle the minor disputes among the people, leaving only the larger disputes for him. Do you need some freedom by appointing some of your too-heavy workload to some others? Yea, I know – it takes trust!
Possibly the biggest benefit of trust is realizing your dreams.
The Bible says “Hope deferred makes a heart grow weak.” When you lose your hope, your dreams become too far away to achieve. The first person you must trust when it comes to your dreams is you. You stand on a threshold. Behind you is the past, the threshold is where you are, and beyond the threshold is where you want to be – your hopes and dreams. The first step to achieving them is taking a leap of faith – on you.
One thing we teach at The Journey Training is that your hopes, goals, and dreams are possible. The first thing it takes is trust – trusting in others, and trusting in yourself. Can you get hurt? Of course you can. But you can also travel farther with trust than by going it alone. Can you fail? Yes. But with each failure you gain the wisdom and confidence to fail better next time – and you will eventually succeed.
Begin to trust and relationship, goals, and dreams will be a little closer to you. And who knows? You just might get exactly what you want!
One of the things I hear often is that personal awareness seminars are only for people who have problems, addictions or for those who are “broken.” This is the same mindset I had before I attended my first seminar.
To be honest, the main reason I went to one is because of my friends and my wife. They were thinking about going and I wanted to go to be with them. They didn’t try to convince me to go, I just did not want to be left out. I had never actually considered attending a personal awareness seminar, especially since I have heard so many jokes about them. I don’t believe anyone, including myself, would have looked at my life and thought I was broken or had problems that needed fixing.
I have always been interested in seeing what the “next level” in business and in life looks like, and I often looked for things that would help me reach it. For many years I have been thought of by many (including myself) to already be at the top of my game. I thought that things were already great.
A few years ago I had two Chick-fil-A locations and I was challenged by a friend to win the “Symbol Of Success” award from Chick-fil-A. The “Symbol Of Success” is a “high achievers” program that is based on sales increases. When you have multiple locations, the challenge becomes even steeper because you have to hit a particular sales increase for both locations, not just for one. Someone from the CFA home office told me that I would not be able to pull this off. I took her up on the challenge and told her that if I made it, she would have to wear a Catwoman costume to our annual company seminar. She agreed, but only if I wore a Superman outfit as well. Little did she know that I already owned a Superman costume, so I was halfway there…
My wife and I had just moved into a house that we had been dreaming of for years. We bought the lot three years prior that with the intention of eventually building. We finally got to where we could do that, and in June of that year we moved into our dream home. My marriage was solid and I was very involved in my church. Everything seemed to be going quite well. I could honestly say I was at one of the highest points in my life!
I attended the first personal awareness seminar in 2008 and during that time I really had a great opportunity to look at myself in the mirror. I realized how wrong I was about what personal development courses were. We get so busy living our lives that we don’t take the time to stop and evaluate where we are. We don’t take time to adjust our course so we can reach our dreams. We just get too busy. We don’t realize that greatness requires continued growth. One of my mentors, Jim Stovall, says “We take more time planning our three-day vacation then we do planning on how to achieve our dreams.”
This course helped me re-analyze my life, realize what I needed to do to focus on my potential and continue to grow.
I can honestly say that this course helped me clarify what my dreams were. Many things in my life are now greater than I ever thought possible. If I hadn’t gone through that course, none of the following growth would have occurred:
- I won the Symbol of Success program (even with the sales decreasing snowstorm in December, shutting down the entire city of Tulsa for days). The reward for winning was that I got my choice of any Ford vehicle!
- I attended the highly coveted Champion Club Award Dinner which honors those with high sales and profits.
- I wrote my first book, “Dysfunctional Inspiration,” so I could share my story. At the time of this writing, there have been over 3000 copies printed and it has impacted many lives.
- I would not have the confidence to start speaking in public forums and inspiring literally thousands of people a year.
So for those who feel that continuing education is pointless because you’re already good… Let me ask you: Why aren’t you great?
What are you doing RIGHT NOW that is causing you to continue to grow toward your dreams? Let me encourage you that greatness requires continual growth.
Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
I was watching an old episode of Bob Newhart. This particular episode was hilarious! A woman came in for a session and began to tell Bob her issues. She said, “I have this fear of being buried alive in a box. I just start thinking about being buried alive and I just panic…I can’t go through tunnels, get in an elevator, or in a house…Anything boxy.” Bob replies, “I’m going to say two words to you and I want you to listen to them very, very carefully. Then, I want you to take them out of the office with you and incorporate them into your life. Are you ready? Here they are: STOP IT!”
Many behaviors, fears and habits that we have are detrimental to our lives. If we would just STOP these things, we could move forward and stop being stuck. Unfortunately, it is not that easy! If it were, no one would need a therapist, a mentor or a teacher. These people in our lives often tell us what to begin doing to find success and what to stop doing to keep those things from holding us back. Let’s take a close look.
If you are overweight, the direct cause of being overweight is eating too much. This will cause your waistline to get larger and your weight to get heavier. So just STOP IT, right? It’s that easy! Just STOP eating so much. If you are always broke regardless of how much money you make, the cause of this is usually mismanagement of money. Reckless spending and not budgeting your money will always cause financial chaos! So just STOP IT, right? If you are constantly losing friends because you get angry easily, just STOP IT! If you are paranoid that people are always trying to rip you off, then you never let anyone help you, just STOP IT!
I wish it were that simple but it usually is not. You see, these behaviors, bad habits and fears are only symptoms of a bigger problem. When you constantly try to STOP IT without getting to the core root of why you do it, it is like cutting a weed off at the surface and leaving the roots. It will always end up growing back. However, if you find out why you are doing these things and you deal with that issue, then the behavior will usually end up falling in line! So how do we find these core root issues?
In The Journey training, we help people find these core issues and deep-rooted reasons. We help people figure out why they sabotage themselves with behaviors, fears and habits. Sometimes it is something that happened years ago that they cannot even remember. Maybe it is an experience they had years ago that is deeply embedded in their subconscious mind and in turn is running their lives. You see, when I was on The Biggest Loser at 430 pounds, I did not have an eating problem. I had a thinking problem. Until I found out why I believed the way I believed, I could not change it! I just went on diet after diet, losing weight and putting it back on – until I had lost over 1,000 pounds in about 10 years. However, the moment I went searching for those roots to dig up, I lost the weight and changed my life for good! Has it been easy? NO! But has it been worth it! You bet your life! So instead of paying all that money to read another book giving you the 10 steps to changing your life, why not attend The Journey Training and take a real step to experiencing lasting change. What have you got to lose? Well, I had 239 pounds to lose. AND I DID!
I hired Josh when he was a young man, and although he didn’t work for me long, he was always respectful. He eventually had to quit due to commitments at school. A few years later he started a snow cone business.
“I started the shack because I had worked at a snow cone stand for a little while and loved everything about the business.”
Over the last 9 years his business has grown from one Josh’s Sno Shack to four Josh’s Sno Shacks along with two mobile units. It’s not unusual to see people camped out for snow cones at the opening of the season, or to see regular lines of 15 to 30 people! His special blend of snow cone goodness has been recognized as the best in Tulsa by just about every news outlet in the area, and his social media presence is very strong, especially with teens. Recently a grocery store chain purchased a number of other grocery stores in the area, including where the original Josh’s Sno Shack was located.
Here’s how it went down according to Josh Juarez:
“Early September I got asked to move my shack by October 6th for repaving. The initial conversation was with a district manager. I was fairly adamant about my concern and desire to get a new contract before I moved the building. She said they were too busy and to just try to contact them later in February. I asked if there was anything I could do to talk to the person making the decision and she told me to email her my information, what I was wanting and that she would forward it to the CEO. I did this and a couple weeks went by with no response. I randomly ran into someone who gave me the name of the individual who was in charge. I called Reasor’s corporate and left a couple of messages for him. No response. I guessed the email address and sent the guy an email. Later that day I got a call from the district manager. She said they were not interested. I pleaded but she couldn’t do anything. I called the individual in charge and he finally answered. He said that he could not do anything and that ‘they had a policy that restricted snow cone stands from being on their property.’ After pleading and trying to show how we could benefit Reasor’s, I respectfully hung up. We posted the information on Facebook and closed (for what we thought was our last day) October 4th. We asked people to write/email Reasor’s and request that we be allowed to stay. People went crazy and the support was insane. Monday afternoon I got a call from channel 2. They did the story about the situation and it aired Monday night at 10pm.Throughout the interview I remained positive towards Reasor’s. Tuesday morning I got a call from the COO of Reasor’s. He said they wanted to figure something out and work around the policy. We had a contract by Thursday and my shack was back the following week.”
This is a classic case of a situation that seemed insurmountable. It looked as though there was no hope and the ship was sinking. Most people would give up, but Josh took a different approach. He applied the “get off your ask” principle.
How often do we see the captain go down with the ship, when all they need to do is persistently ask for help? Instead, they choose to not ask for help. It could be one of a number of reasons, but the end result is they go down with the ship when they may not have needed to. Is there something in your life that you may need to ask for help to achieve your goal?
In The journey Training, we teach that there are an infinite number of possibilities to get what you need, and the most basic – yet often overlooked – is simply asking for it. Maybe it’s pride, or embarrassment that can cause you to let the ship sink. Isn’t it time you get off your ask? You just might find, just like in The Journey Training, that there are people that want to help you get where you need to go!
From the moment we are born, our experiences begin to “program” the computer we call our brain. When we cry, our mother usually ran into the room to nurture us. When we got a little older, we learned what “NO!” meant. Our programming tells us not to put our hand on a hot stove or hit our hand with a hammer. Our experiences help form our beliefs about ourselves. Having positive experiences will lend to knowing who we are. Negative experiences can and will most likely lead to an identity crisis.
Theses experiences define how we make our daily choices. Our brain is an incredible thing! It can “tune out” almost everything around us and allow us to focus on a specific task – even if we still see or hear our environment! Our brains were designed to be able to react. It’s a survival mechanism, a reflex. Some things are out of our control like breathing, our heart beats or our digestive system. This is good! I would hate to forget to make my heart beat! As often as I lose my keys, I’d be a dead man by now!
So what happens when you do things based on a belief? Great things if what we believe is true. But what if it’s a “false belief” or what if we are ignorant of our true identity?
A young woman is preparing dinner. She takes a ham and chops it in half before putting it in a pot. Her daughter asks, “Why did you chop the ham in half mommy?” The mother responds, “I don’t know, it’s just how my mother always prepared it.” Later, she asked her mom why she did that. To her surprise, her mother responds, “My pot was too small for the ham, so I had to chop it in half so it would fit in the pot.” The young woman had been doing it for years, and didn’t even need to! What we do every day just becomes normal.
In the tale of King Arthur, all you had to do was pull the sword from the stone to reveal your identity as King! People all around would try and no one could do it! Arthur, a young peasant boy, passed by the sword every day. He never tried to pull Excalibur from the stone. Why? He didn’t know his true identity. His programs and false beliefs kept him from his rightful place on the throne.
What could be holding you back from your destiny? It could be a program you don’t even know exists. A program that taught your sub conscience to have a false belief that causes you to walk by your own Excalibur moment! It might be an identity crisis that causes you to never really know your true identity – and with that, the knowledge and belief of all you are capable of. You could be stuck in “The Matrix.”
In The Journey Training, we explore programs, false or limiting beliefs, and even who we think we are to help uncover a life that we’ve always wanted! Each weekend, it is amazing how many people we watch have their “Excalibur Moment” and uncover things that were holding them back from their dreams. Join our next Threshold class and take the time to explore your identity, and find out just who you really are! I have a feeling it may surprise you!
