I see it every January. People set New Year’s resolutions, only to watch them go down in flames a few weeks later. It’s not January yet, but have you ever set a goal or had a desire that just kept getting sabotaged over and over again? I have! And in the end, we blame everything but ourselves, going victim to the things around us and taking little to no responsibility.
What if I were to tell you that it is most likely you that is responsible for sabotaging your dreams and goals. Yes, you! Not the lack of time, or any other excuse you can muster up! If you want it, there it is – GO AND GET IT! If it were only that simple, right?
Your agenda is all about your true intention
Intentions are just that – something you plan on doing – which means you probably aren’t doing much about it right now. If I told you I intended to write a word beginning with the letter “Z”, would you say it is my true intention? Well, you couldn’t yet. I haven’t written one! But when I tell you that a Zebra has stripes, then you know for sure. Yes, it was my true intention to write a word beginning with the letter “Z”, and I just proved it. People say they are going to do thing, but so many times nothing gets done. Why is that?
I believe it is because many times we want something, but it is not our true intention to have it. There is something in the way. We’ve all noticed it and said, “Why do I keep eating badly when I just want to lose weight?” Or it might be, “Why do I keep charging things on my card when I want to be debt free?”
Our agendas are made up of priorities
When we see someone achieve the goal they set out to achieve, we might ask, “How did you stay on track?”
When I lost 239 pounds in 6 months, 3 weeks, and 5 days, no one could believe it! The world was shocked when I burst through that paper. But I wasn’t! It was my true intention. Were there things that popped up and got in the way? Yes! But I stayed on track, and to this day Darci says it was the most amazing thing she has ever seen. Because I got rid of my hidden agendas. And losing as much weight as I could became the very top tier on my priority list! When I was faced with a decision, it was easy because I knew what I really wanted.
It’s our hidden agenda that keeps us in failure
If you state a goal or desire, but it just never seems to happen, it may be because you have a hidden agenda. Let’s say I am committed to losing 4 pounds this week, but I have a lunch date every day at places that have my favorite fried foods! I will either re-schedule those lunches or change the locations, or I will most probably not lose 4 pounds this week. And if I am more committed to eating those fried foods than I am to losing 4 pounds, the goal is crushed. You see, I wanted to eat those lunches more than I wanted success. And I think we all should find these hidden agendas and challenge them so we find the success we want and deserve!
When you state a goal or desire, there will be other things you are committed to that will challenge your every decision, so you have to challenge those hidden agendas and win. In the above example, challenging them consisted of a decision to change the locations or re-schedule the lunches. Getting rid of the secondary agenda that might sabotage the first one is key. Here is a real-life example that happened last week.
A friend asked to have breakfast with me, so we met at the bagel shop. I got my coffee and banana, skipping the bagel of course because I have goals to keep! We sat down and he told me the doctors said if he doesn’t lost weight, as early as two years from now he would probably lose his leg from complications of diabetes. They were presenting him with the option of surgery, and he wanted to ask my opinion. Here is what I told him: “You have got to make your decisions ahead of time, before you are faced with a temptation. You need to get on a plan and stick to it! Don’t put it off, pre-prepare your meals on Sunday for your lunches! I grill chicken, have my meals prepared, and take them to work so my decisions are already made for me. It’s the only way you will succeed without surgery.”
He answered with, “Danny, here’s the thing. I can’t eat left-overs. I don’t know what it is, but I hate them! I only like fresh food.”
My reply was, “Well, you have to choose between losing your leg, having a dangerous surgery that doesn’t solve the problem in the end, or eating left-overs. The choice is yours, but if you say you will lose weight and bring that hidden agenda along, you might as well go ahead and buy your wheelchair.”
I don’t know what he has decided to do, but I sincerely hope he can battle the hidden agenda of not eating left-overs and make it his true intention to lose the weight and save his life.
Each month, some of the hidden agendas or, as my old friend Brian Klemmer called them – competing commitments – that people walk into The Journey Training with become uncovered, challenged, and overcome! We’ve seen great goals and dreams be achieved, but the first step was identifying what it was that was keeping them from what they truly wanted. When you identify those hidden agendas that are there, the true intention becomes a little clearer; and the path to what you really want seems to be straightened out into a shorter distance!