I’ve been thinking and praying for several days about how to share my thoughts on what I’ve been witnessing on Facebook. I love it when God sends the perfect message to help me focus my thoughts and get things started. I received this today, found in James3:9-10.
“With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praising and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.” NIV (New International Version)
Unfortunately, what I’m seeing the most on Facebook these days is more cursing than praising. Many people are joining in what I’ll call the “virtual riot” of the moment about abusive police officers, racist white people, protesting black people, our president, republicans, democrats, Muslims, Christians, etc. People are commenting on and sharing things based on anger and hatred that are only meant to humiliate, denigrate, demean, or condemn another person, race, or religion.
These posts have nothing to do with actual solutions. They only add fuel to the fire and encourage others to join in the virtual riot. That place where anyone can sit safely behind a little screen and never actually participate in a real discussion with those that they are so bravely cursing at. And when others join in, it justifies their feelings and comments and makes them feel so right!
I’m a very proud American citizen! I believe in our right to free speech and I served in our military for 20 years to protect it. I’m not saying that we don’t have the right to speak what’s on our minds. I’m asking us all to make the choice to really think about what we say before we say it! Is what we have to say constructive or destructive? Would God want us to post and share these things?
I know in my heart that we can all do better on this!
In The Journey Training we believe EVERY person is a child of God who has value beyond measure and deserves to be loved as God loves them.
As Christians, we are called to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Jesus gives all Christians these words as part of the great commandment. He does not say “please do this”, or “please think about this”. He commands us to do this!
The easiest thing to do is to follow the crowd, join the anger and hatred, and go along with the rioting mob. The hardest thing to do is something different from the crowd – to choose to love someone, as a person created in the image of God – even if that person has done something that we think is wrong or hurtful.
Loving our neighbor doesn’t mean they get a free pass to do whatever they want. Loving our neighbor means that we are willing to help them see when they are not being who they were created to be and that there is another choice or choices they could make.
Loving them means we do this with honesty and grace, without humiliating them, condemning them, or crushing their spirit. It means we do the hard work to build them up to be the man or woman that God created them to be, not what the world has told them to be or told them that they are. Loving them means we do this with dignity and respect while we may disagree.
As we head into 2015, I challenge all of us to make the CHOICE to look at things from another PERSPECTIVE and do something DIFFERENT!
Stop doing the easy thing by participating in the virtual riots that are based in anger and hatred!
Make the harder choice. Have the courage to live your life from a foundation of LOVE. Look for ways to build people up to be the best they can be instead of tearing them down.
If you can’t imagine how to do this or you don’t think it’s possible, check out The Journey Training. Come join us in 2015!
A few years ago, I was on a quest. I was proving a point, I was getting off my ask.
It started with a trip I wanted to go on, and asking everyone I knew for $25 for the trip. I told everyone that I had the money, so I could afford to go, and I don’t have to go. All the same, I asked if they would give me $25 so I can go to the Bob Harrison Increase event seminar in Hawaii.
Taking action in life is something few do. Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, says “taking action is a true measure of intelligence.” There countless books on the concept.
My time with Myles Munroe was a perfect example of this.
One of my goals during that trip was to have lunch, breakfast, or dinner with every speaker of that conference, so I had to look for opportunities to take action. I knew it certainly would not happen by accident. If I was looking for it to be an accident, then I needed to make that accident happen. I first saw Myles Munroe at the airport, and introduced myself at the luggage pickup. I did not feel our relationship was at the point to ask him yet, though. So I waited.
Later in the week, I found a iPhone on a table, ringing, but with no one answering it. So I picked it up and looked at the pictures. It was Dr. Munroe’s. When I went to give it to him, I used that opportunity to ask him to lunch. He graciously said yes, so we set a time.
On the day of our visit, it ended up being quite the group. I had not specifically asked for a private lunch, and Myles had invited 11 other people besides the two of us for a total of 13 at lunch that day. During that time, I found out many incredible things about this leader.
I asked him how he spent his time.
I asked him about some hard decisions.
I saw his interaction as a husband since his wife was there.
I saw his interaction as a father, since his daughter was there. (I found out she loves our Polynesian sauce and since she lived in Bahamas, she did not get much anymore, so I pulled an Arthur, and mailed her a case)
At one point I excused myself to go to the restroom, and gave the waitress my credit card, ensuring I would cover the bill. At the end of the lunch his protege was confused, and was not happy that he did not get to pay. He was kind of vocal about it.
Then it happened. Here is the biggest thing I learned…
The gentleman said that Myles was his mentor, and even in this event he has not been able to get time with Myles alone. When he said it, it seemed that he might be irritated specifically at me. Without missing a beat, Myles interrupted him and said something that I will never forget.
He said to his mentee, “Here is the difference, You did not get time with me alone because you did not ask. He asked,” and gestured to me. Then he continued “And he paid the bill because he made it happen.”
Sometimes we just do things automatically, without thinking it through completely or analyzing it. We just do.
This particular meeting sealed what I already knew to do. Ask. It validated to me that many of us do not get the opportunities because we do not ask or seek out opportunities.
Myles Munroe knew how do this.
My dad always told me, “Never buy a brand new car! As soon as you drive it off the lot, it’s worth thousands less than when you signed the papers!” I always wondered why that was true, but it is. Just try it! Buy a $20,000 car and drive it home. Then put it up for sale. It might only have 10 miles on the odometer, but you won’t get anyone to buy it for what you paid.
The value of a dollar is exactly that: a dollar! Then why does a car depreciate? One reason is because it becomes “used.” A car usually lasts a certain number of miles, and the longer it is driven, generally the less it is worth. My old truck, which my daughter’s friends call “The Hobo Truck”, has well over 220,000 miles on it, rust on the sides and scratches all over it! I even wrecked that old GMC, and my friend fixed it with a Chevy front end! It’s such a rag-tag truck, but I love it. It has taken me to all kinds of places; to see my kids perform, to my job, to the tryout of The Biggest Loser, and to so many great places creating so many great memories – but I doubt anyone else would find the kind of value in it that I do. To them, it’s just a junky old truck.
What about you? What are you worth?
So often we have let others determine our value by their thoughts and actions. When we were young, the opinion of others meant little to us. When we began to learn to walk, we fell down again and again – and people laughed! But we didn’t care. We got up and tried again and we eventually succeeded, but not before a thousand laughs and chuckles. Yet we didn’t let it bother us one bit.
Somewhere along the way, we began to care about what others think about us – perhaps just a little too much. The “you’ll never amount to anything” that a teacher said, or the “You’re ugly” or “You’re stupid” that a person said when we were young became so imprinted on our hearts that it caused us to depreciate in value. When we failed at something in front of others and were laughed at, we felt like a failure instead of an explorer that simply hit a bump in the road. And when we were picked on or hurt and abused by someone, it caused us to question our value and worth. Well, I am going to tell you something: You are worth the same, if not more, than the day you were born.
Remember that dollar? No matter how old it becomes or how many hands it passes through to become used and abused, torn, tattered and neglected – it’s still worth a dollar. Yet I see so many people who think they’re worth so little – just because they’ve been used, abused, torn, tattered and neglected. They feel small. They think, “Who am I to think I can do that?” or maybe “Who would want me as a friend?” I see it every day, and it breaks my heart. I still feel depreciated at times. Why will we will hold a dollar in our hand and no matter what, we know is worth the same as any other dollar! In fact, the older it gets, it can actually appreciate! An old dollar bill can be worth thousands of times its original value! Then I ask: why can’t you?
No matter what they say, you are beautiful. No matter what they think, you are awesome. No matter how they treat you, you are worthy. Still don’t believe me? Then do me a favor: take out a dollar bill, crumple it up, throw it down, stomp on it, and cover it with dirt. Then pick it up, shake it off and take it to the store and ask for change. I’ll bet you they give you a dollar’s worth!
Graduates of The Journey Training consistently say they feel more valuable in most areas of their lives after completing our courses. Do you want to get back the explorer in you that’s not afraid to try again – no matter what they say? Sign up for the next Journey Threshold class and see where it leads you. It led me to become the Biggest Loser in the history of the show!
The definition of Beginning is as follows: “The point in time or space at which something starts.” Many of us see our lives as a dash – that dash on our headstone between when we were born and when we die. Although our dash is our entire life, I believe our life is like an investment: past results do not guarantee future performance. If you look at the fine print in the top mutual funds they will all have contain disclaimer. Why? Because the future is unwritten, and that’s a good thing!
We all fall down. The stock market rises, and it corrects – and sometimes even crashes! It’s a part of life. Our crash doesn’t define us or determine our future. How we respond to our crash defines us and determines our future. If you’re in a crash or have experienced one in your past, and don’t like where you are now, the good news is you can begin again.
I doubt anyone reading this has never felt hopeless at some point; hopeless in your finances, marriage, faith, health, weight, or maybe your job. That’s one thing we all have in common. Hopelessness is a direct negative result of the feeling pain. The good thing about pain is that it can also have a positive result: healing and growth. Healing and growth happens when we look at our pain – our crash – and we learn from it. If past performance guaranteed future results, we’d be finished. Thank God we can begin again! So, the million-dollar question is: How do we begin again? Well, I can tell you how I did it – by losing my regrets.
One day on The Biggest Loser, I made a terrible choice. I played a game that resulted in me having to eat a 780 calorie cupcake – and that’s not good when you’re in a weight-loss competition! I made a mistake! I crashed. I immediately began beating myself up about my bad decision. Coach Mo noticed this, came up to me and gently said, “Someday you’re going to have to be okay with your choices.” Later that day, Jillian Michaels, my trainer on NBC’s The Biggest Loser, had me on the treadmill and was killing me when she asked, “Danny, what’s wrong? Something’s bothering you.”
I got off the treadmill, sat down, and told her, “Jillian, I am so stupid. I played the game, ate the cupcake, and now I’m in trouble. I had to eat 780 calories more than the others and I may go home. I am so stupid!”
She replied, “So you’re going home, huh?”
“I could!”
Jillian said, “Well, that depends on you, not your stupid decision.” She went on to explain to me that holding on to regrets – the decisions that made you crash – will be your downfall, not the decisions themselves! You take your good decisions and run with them! You take your bad decisions and learn from them – use them to fuel your next step. That will determine your future.
That day, I grew – The pain and regret I felt began to cause hopelessness, but I worked through it and found healing & growth. I decided to begin again, right then and there! I laid down my regrets and worked harder that week than ever before – and I set a record on The Biggest Loser by losing the most weeks in a row of double digits, 7 weeks, beginning that very week! I dealt with my past, lost my regrets, and I was able to begin again.
What have you carrying from your past? Are there things you need to lay down and begin again? The Journey Training can help. I began losing my regrets in my training, and you can begin again with the next Journey Threshold class! Just make a new decision; a decision to lay down your regrets and begin again!
I recently performed at the finale show for Tom McCloud’s “Lose It for the Kids.” Tom lost 95 pounds in 10 months while working out with me this year, but that’s not the amazing thing! Yes, losing 95 pound in 10 months without surgery, diet pills, or some extreme plan is amazing in itself, but there’s much more to the story.
I knew Tom from a few years before when he interviewed me after winning The Biggest Loser for his magazine Community Spirit. One morning last year I was working out at Fitness Together Jenks/Riverside with Michael Watkins when Tom showed up to take some pictures of me for a monthly column that I write. When I saw him, I gently asked, “Tom, why don’t you get in here and hook up with Michael and lose some weight with me?” His answer: “Well Danny, I broke my neck a few years back and I don’t think I could.” I replied with, “Tom, that will stop you as long as you let it stop you. We can work around that.” It took a while, but he finally got inspired and gave me a call. This is where it gets exciting.
You see, Tom devised a plan. He thought, “If I’m going to do this, why not make it something BIG!” He asked me to be his workout partner, and devised “Lose It for the Kids,” so his weight-loss journey could benefit someone in need. He made a website and asked people to pledge money per pound he lost for Contact Missions, a ministry of Tulsa Neighborhood Network who recently began a campaign for outreach to kids in West Tulsa who are underserved. They tutor, mentor, and coach them, providing school programs and expanding their subsidized summer-long camps focused on building both faith and character. He began to see how his losing weight could also benefit those kids – which is a product of THINKING BIG! He raised over $50,000 for the kids, and lost almost 100 pounds to boot! Now that’s a WIN-WIN!
You see, thinking small might be just thinking of him. Why think small when you can THINK BIG? What have you got to give? Some may have money, while others may have time. Some may bring a gift like music, while others bring the gift of love and service. What do you have that can benefit others? Whatever you have, you can use it for contribution to someone else while it also accomplishes what you set out to do.
Winning The Biggest Loser has provided me with a platform I never thought I would have. I get to speak all over the world (7 countries & 45 states) to help motivate and inspire others to reach for their dreams. I am blessed to be able to pay it forward and help others in my Bootcamp here in Tulsa, where Christy C. has lost 70 pounds in 4 months and Jeff S. has lost 80 pounds. I have taken what I have and given it to others.
My friend Arthur Greeno once told me, “People want to be a part of something BIG.” I urge you to THINK BIG. What is it you can do for others while you achieve the success you have been striving for? Arthur is a part of Keith’s Ice Cold Lemonade Stand, where this summer he helped a young man named Keith, who has Cerebral Palsy, raise over $120,000 for The Little Lighthouse – simply by selling lemonade. Yes, Keith’s could have been a single lemonade stand, but Arthur chose to THINK BIG, get sponsors and volunteers, and make a BIG difference for others.
The facilitator’s of The Journey Training found freedom we could never imagine, causing our vision and lives to become MUCH BIGGER than we ever thought possible. We decided to pay if forward and create The Journey Training in Tulsa, Oklahoma. If you want to THINK BIG, why don’t you sign up for the next Threshold class at www.thejourneytraining.com? What have you got to lose – except the small thinking!
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